UK_Widowmaker

Pilot pretends to faint!!...what a Bastard! :lol:

You guys have obviously never played Second Life!

Aww...lighten up guys!...you sound like Barristers!

These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, hehehehe __________________________________________________ Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia ? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? ( UK ). A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die. __________________________________________________ Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? ( USA ) A:Depends how much you've been drinking. __________________________________________________ Q:I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? ( Sweden ) A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water. __________________________________________________ Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay ? ( UK ) A: What did your last slave die of? __________________________________________________ Q:Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia ? ( USA ) A: A-Fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not ... Oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked. __________________________________________________ Q:Which direction is North in Australia ? (USA ) A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions. _________________________________________________ Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia ? ( UK ) A:Why? Just use your fingers like we do... Q:Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? ( USA ) A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is Oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked. __________________________________________________ Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia ? ( UK ) A: You are a British politician, right? __________________________________________________ Q:Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? ( Germany ) A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal. __________________________________________________ Q:Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. ( USA ) A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets. __________________________________________________ Q:I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. ( USA ) A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking. __________________________________________________ Q:I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia ? ( USA ) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather. __________________________________________________ Q:Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia ? ( France ) A: Only at Christmas. Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? ( USA ) A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first

Wow!...this looks pretty damn cool!...I musta missed this in the main forum!...gonna download tomorrow, and give it a whirl!...thanks m8

And with Christmas coming up...it's never been a better time to buy for that 'Aviator' in YOUR household!!

:lol: :lol:

I think the World IS moving towards a more 'Socialist' idealogy....people are fed up with Corporate strangleholds. This doesnt of course mean, that making a sucessful business into a money earner..even a BIG money earner is a bad thing...just that you should have a Social responsibility.... Bill Gates is an excellent example of the latter....the Corporate Banking System..an example of the former

I keep a Diary about the Blonde Girl next Door!...Is that wrong?

I suppose I came quite late to the Fantasy genre...never played Morrowind...and only arrived at the Party to see Oblivion. Loved the old 'Ultima' series however...and Dark Messiah takes some beating

I love that song (this one might help to cheer you up)......not

It's an absolute disgrace, that ordinary people are allowed to keep Dangerous, Exotic, RARE species like this!...nowhere else in the civilised world would allow citizens to keep f****** Tigers!!!!!......STOP IT!...they're rare enough as it is!!!! (as someone says in the comments) "This idiot that owned these animals was in and out of jail, had previous charges for animal cruelty and was allowed to have these animals with little to no oversight. His compound had been visited numerous times by law enforcement and no one did a damned thing to shut him down. Ohio has the most lax laws on this sort of thing and what's most tragic is this could have all been avoided." I can only just imagine the utter Carnage that could have been caused, had these highly stressed, dangerous animals, had been anywhere near a school!....It's Irresponsible of the Ohio regional government in the extreme!...I would be filing a lawsuit against the f*cking lot of them! http://digg.com/news/lifestyle/ohio_police_kills_48_lions_bears_cheetahs_exotic_animals_escaped

Rik Mayall....Fishing...and Bombadier Ale!....HUZZAH!!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=TBKKX4_uC2M

Everything is Banned in the UK m8...you should know that!

Yes.... he's not done much 'proper' acting since his Quadbike accident!...I hope he does something soon...I miss the Mad genius!!

And Blue in colour (which is a bit of a Bummer if you dont have the DVI-VGA adapter, and your monitor is DVI only :(

Can you 'Hear' the PC booting normally?....is there an onboard Graphics card port you can try after removing your Addon graphics card? Though, it sounds like Almost certainly Graphics card is Kaput m8....sorry

I still have to learn about 40 of these!! Written by Regina Brett, 90 years old. This is something we should all read at least once a week!!!!! "To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more: 1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. 3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Change the way you think. 4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will. Stay in touch. 5. Pay off your credit cards every month. 6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree. 7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone. 8. Release your children when they become adults, its their life now 9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay cheque. 10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile. 11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present. 12. It's OK to let your children see you cry. 13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about. 14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it. 15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. 16. Take a deep breath It calms the mind. 17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. 18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. 19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer. 21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special. 22. Just because you believe you are right, doesn't mean you are. Keep an open mind. 23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple. 24. The most important sex organ is the brain. 25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you. 26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?' 27. Always choose life. 28. Forgive everyone everything. 29. What other people think of you is none of your business. 30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time. 31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. 32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. 33. Believe in miracles. 34. Your job is to love your children, not choose who they should love. 35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now. 36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young. 37. Your children get only one childhood. 38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved. 39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere. 40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back. 41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need. 42. The best is yet to come... (Can’t wait to find out what! ) 43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. 44. Yield.. 45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift." Friends are the family that we choose.

I like James May....but Clarkson gets on my tits

Amen to that!

The Poppy symbolises soldiers from ALL sides who died (at least thats how I view it) I feel as sorry for the German Soldiers who died in the mud and filth of Flanders, as I do for the Commonwealth Soldiers who did (and all other nations) I'd pass them a little brown envelope....but it would contain Semtex...and 30lb of Dog ****!

George Batt, the general secretary of the Normandy Veterans Association, condemned the decision, describing it as "disgraceful". The 86-year-old, who fought in the second world war, said: "I don't really understand it. I can't see any harm in wearing a poppy. You surely don't need rules and regulations in Fifa like this. It's so sad. "I would think about 90% of the population wear them. I'm lost for words. I think it's a bit childish because, after all is said and done, if it wasn't for us blokes Fifa wouldn't be here. They wouldn't be playing football."

I hardly think that the Pro-Celebrity, international Tiddlywinks contest counts somehow

Beautiful Dog m8

FIFA are a total waste of space anyway...if I was the England Team...I'd wear them anyway!!!...and Fifa can go f*** themselves