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Posted (edited)

While in China, an American man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom the entire time he is there.

A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his penis covered with bright green and purple spots.

Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.

The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, “I've got bad news for you, you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here in the US, we know very little about it.”

The man looks a little perplexed and says, “Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc.”

The doctor answers, “I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis.”

The man screams in horror, “Absolutely not! I want a second opinion!!!”

The doctor replies, “Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want but surgery is your only option.”

The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease.

The Chinese doctor examines his penis and proclaims, “Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. Vewy ware disease.”

The guy says to the doctor, “Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can we do? My American doctor wants to cut off my penis!”

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. “Stupid American docttah, always want opawate. Make more money dat way. No need amputate!”

“Oh, thank God!” the man exclaims.

“Yes”, says the Chinese doctor. “Wait two week. Faw off by itself...!”

Edited by UK_Widowmaker
  • Like 4
Posted

It reminds me of another bad-ending story:

 

An African man goes to the swimming-pool, and while in the changing-room, he is shouted at by a very ill-mannered yokel:

- Wowowowow!!! How long is your Black Mamba, man!? What did you do to have it that long?

Quite disgusted by the redneck's impoliteness, the African man still answers with a very straight face:

- Well, you see, in my village, we hang turtles to the young boy's willy, small turtles at first, heavier ones later, until it gets longer.

- Wowowow! That's fine, dude. I'll just try the stuff...

 

One week later, the African man at the pool meets again the yokel, who shouts at him once more:

- Hey brother, I have tried your stuff. With hanging turtles, remember?

The African just can't believe the jerk is that dumb, and asks:

- Ah? And is there any progress? Is your willy longer?

- Nope dude. But there is some progress: it is all black already...

 

:mamba:

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