Ah, Bullethead you old wacko you, I knew there was something about you that I felt akin to. I was also a FedEx driver for several years. I was a swing driver, I dunno if you have those at your station, but a swing driver in the city is misery. D:
The only time I ever thought a dog would be the death of me was when I was walking up to a house with an open garage, and I was looking at the package and typing on my tracker. When I looked up there was a massive pit bull in the garage and it took me a bit by surprise and I hesitated, and the damn dog just comes charging out at me, teeth barred, all ready to give an oral exam to my most life-sustaining fleshy parts. I remember thinking "well f***, I'm going to die." And about 5 feet from me, the chain that was thankfully hooked to its collar ran out of slack and stopped the dog in its tracks. Then it was all barks and slobber and teeth gnashing, and the owner came out saying the usual bulls**t "oh he's nice, oh he's not going to hurt anyone, oh blah blah blah my little angel, etc." I told him his dog was going to kill me. Really actually kill me. He told me I was overreacting, and was kind of a dick. I told him I couldn't complete a delivery with such a dangerous dog so took the package back into the truck with me and drove off.
People should be nice to their FedEx drivers.