Moose Milk

[+Typhoid 231]

THE MOOSE MILK SECRET

 

The secret of Moose Milk has been sought after for many years by Americans and Europeans alike. However, the inhabitants of the Great White North long ago decided that the ingredients must be kept from those who would use the recipe to influence others.

 

Moose Milk was officially adopted by Canadians in 1867, but European explorers have been after the recipe since Christopher Columbus, John Cabot and Jacques Cartier first arrived in North America in the late 1400’s. The illusive recipe caused them and future explorers so much anxiety, that many traveled clear across North America looking for the recipe, hence the discovery of the Pacific Ocean. However, after years of searching, the disappointed voyageurs eventually returned to Europe without the prized recipe and have had to put up with Bitters, Beaujolais and Weissen beer ever since.

 

The Americans have been after the recipe for years as well. In 1866 they sent the Fenian raiders into Canada to retrieve knowledge of the superb substances which were said to cure many an ailment including impotence. But alas, they were beaten back from the shores of the Great Lakes and have since resided to the South of Canada, hoping one day to catch a poor unsuspecting Canadian on the wrong side of the border so they could finally force him/her to reveal the secret.

 

Recently, however, rumor has it that a young pilot officer who was on tour in Colorado Springs released the secret of Moose Milk to his NORAD brethren (he had consumed large amounts of Bud light, large….amounts). Much to the dismay of the Canadian Chief of Staff, the recipe was recorded and distributed among the staff at HQ NORAD.

 

So, after 500 years of secrecy, here is the recipe:

 

10 gallons of Moose Milk (must be from a female moose)

1 large bucket (25 gallon capacity)

15 Cdn pinecones

1 bucket of sap from a maple tree (must be Quebec grown)

1 cup of cod liver oil (must be from an Atlantic cod fish)

1 cup of salmon scales (must be from a BC salmon)

2 cups of Prairie Oysters

7 cups of Great Lakes Water (well make it bottled water)

2 gallons of Yukon snow (without the skidoo tracks)

2 gallons of NWT crushed ice

10 gallons of NFLD Screech (version of rum commonly used as paint thinner)

 

Carefully milk the moose in a large bucket, gently stirring in the maple sap, snow and crushed ice. Gently mix the cod liver oil and water with the prairie oysters and add them to the mixture. Lastly mix the entire 10 gallons of Screech and mix well (discourage all from smoking during this operation or maintaining open flames). Top with pinecones and salmon scales (for aesthetics purposes only).

 

Makes 25 imperial gallons. Serves two (2).

[+Dave 2,322]

Serves two (2).

 

Serves two (2) Canadians

[Guest Saganuay82]

Thats a part of the recipe of the beer that we send south of the border too.

 

Speaking of Moose Milk, the big vat of it served up in the hanger while in Boston last Sunday was some good.

[+Dave 2,322]

Thats a part of the recipe of the beer that we send south of the border too.

 

Speaking of Moose Milk, the big vat of it served up in the hanger while in Boston last Sunday was some good.

 

Damn and I missed it.

[Guest Saganuay82]

Yeah wrong state. DWCACE missed it too and he was only with a hangover and 1.5 hrs away.

 

 

Beginnings

Edited December 15, 2007 by Saganuay82