Slartibartfast 153 Posted July 26, 2014 I Love this Doctor!Q : Doctor, I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?A : Heart only good for so many beats, and that it... Don't waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.Q : Should I reduce my alcohol intake?A : Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Fruit very good. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Grain good too. Bottom up!Q : How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?A : Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.Q : What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?A : Can't think of one, sorry. My philosophy : No pain...good!Q : Aren't fried foods bad for you?A : YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?Q : Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?A : Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.Q : Is chocolate bad for me?A : You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!Q : Is swimming good for your figure?A : If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.Q : Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?A : Hey! 'Round' is shape!Well... I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.And remember :Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Chardonnay in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!" 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
+pcpilot 181 Posted July 26, 2014 (edited) "Q : How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?A : Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one." Geeeeeeze, I about spit my sandwich thru the monitor... Edited July 26, 2014 by pcpilot 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Wrench 9,614 Posted July 26, 2014 excellent! wonder if this guy takes my health insurance??? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PinkPanther 0 Posted July 30, 2014 Q : Aren't fried foods bad for you?A : YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad? Hate to rain on the fun but when you heat vegetable oil to fry the food all the nutrients are destroyed. If you want healthy oil do not heat. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
