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navychief

Not impressed.

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My wife's girlfriend and her boyfriend came over to our place for a cookout this afternoon.

 

Not impressed, to say the least.

 

To begin with, he made a point of stating that he thought flight sims were a waste of time. He said this just as I was firing up the computer to show him what I spend so much time with.

 

After demonstrating FS9 for him, including a cat shot with a F-14B, he mentioned that he had been a Electronics Warfare Operator on B-52s, and knew quite a lot about military aviation.

 

In short, I got the impression that he liked himself A LOT, and made it known.

 

Most commissioned officers I have met have been regular folks, but occasionally I run into those who have a definite superiority attitude.

 

This guy fits the latter description. What a bozo.

 

Enough ranting for now.

 

See you in the virtual skies, shipmates.

 

Navy Chief

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Was he a product of a free education? Next time he is over ask why they wear their Dickies (ascot) with a flightsuit; is it because they drool? :D

 

 

Fly Navy

 

Cheers

Beer

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I was gonna say "Why do Navy guys wear theyre nametags on the back of theyre tousers" but then I noticed he was a EW on a B52 so that doesnt relate to him. If your wondering about the answer it would be "So Marines know who theyre banging". Sorry Chief thought Id have to give the answer since I started it.

 

Semper Fi

Creepy847

Edited by Creepy847

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Creepy that is good!! Hey Chief gotta keep in mind he's a butter bars...as a NONCOM you know WE run the military,and they just take up space.

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Flight sims are a waste of time, boy do I LOVE wasting it!!! :lol::lol::lol:

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Creepy,

Just for that remark I'm going to kick the s*** out my cousin, just got out af the Corps, and it's going to be your fault. Chief, don't sweat the "0", he's most likely an un-noticed footnote in his units history. Like you, most officers I met were golden, and the ones that weren't were put "in charge" of the ordnance shop. After that they didn't last long.

Just be glad it's your wife's girlfriends boyfriend. My 13 year old discovered boys this summer, I've shot three of the testosterone charged mutants with my air-soft so far. Most of the time I just show them the my Navy Expert Pistol and Rifle, that usually cools thier jets. ;) I cant wait till she really starts dating.

 

The source of my grey hair...

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Hey I didnt know the Navy had an expert rifle badge. I thought you guys wore pizza boxes. Greatest rifleman in the world come from only 2 places in the world. PI or San Diego the rest well lets just say BRASF doesnt mean a thing to them.

An leave your cousin alone.

On a brighter note Im going thru the same thing as you with these teenagers. My daughter is driving me nuts. Phone ringing off the damn hook cant even prounouce theyre names. Afew nights ago I lost it an told her the next male that calls the house better tell me his name is Bubba or Charlie or Woody.

 

R/S

Creepy847

Semper Fi.

 

Heres something for you Navy guys to make you feel good today.

 

A sailor in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, ''Wanna hear a MARINE joke?''

 

The guy next to him replies, ''Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I'm 6' tall, 200 lbs, and I'm a MARINE. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2'' tall, weighs 225, and he's a MARINE. The fella next to him is 6'5'' tall, weighs 250, and he's also a MARINE. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?''

 

The sailor says, ''Nah, I don't want to have to explain it three times.''

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Jeez Chief, sorry to hear that you had to invite such a peckerwad over to your house! I feel kinda lucky that I haven't even seen an officer since I've been at my new unit except for when I swore in. Ah, the good old days are back again. I just talk to the officers over a radio, I don't have to see them in person (thank gawd).

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OMG!! Creepy that joke was great!!!!

 

I am going to remember that one!

 

Navy Chief

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Geeze creepy, I about spit my beer all over my monitor! :lol: Hey, you wouldnt happen to be the same gyrene creepy that belongs to the Military Gamers Group would ya?

 

Chief, that dweeb that came over to your house has probably always been one, ya savvy? ;)

 

 

By the way firehawk, you have my deepest sympathy man... :D

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Flight sims are the only way for us to bomb each other and laugh at it afterwards.

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Hey thats me. Havent been over there in sometime.

 

Just bought Doom 3 tonight can you believe that in a game as high tech is this you have to actually hold a damn flashlight. I mean come on this is in the future they give you a pistol an a flashlight.

 

I could have bought the game called Walmart Security Wars an had a better choice of weapons.

 

The game is very dark so you need light an theres nothing worse than having one of those monsters standing right next to you in the blackness an scarying the poop out of ya. I have to go from holding my weapon to holding the flashlight

 

You dont even have flairs like Alien Vrs Pred 2. Anyways for the graphics an creepyness I give this game 8 stars ot of 10. It pretty system friendly to an you can config it for many system specs. They give you at least 4.

 

Well enough about that. Got rid of the kids today. My daughter whos 12 asked for a nose ring the other day. Wife says "ask your father" I say no way not while your under my roof.

 

Last night she pierced her own nose in the bathroom upstairs. I found her in there with blood all over the sink.

 

When asking her why she stated that its her body an she feels that its not a big thing. My response was this please get out of the bathroom before I pierce your face with my fist.

 

Im having to sit back an think about this one. I know that nose rings are that big of a deal but you have to wonder is this her way of saying Ill do whatever I wish.

 

Well lets see who can I pick on.

 

An US Marine was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana and he wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the Marine shouted, "maybe I'll just go out and get my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes made at a reasonable price!"

The vendor said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you will run into a couple of Rangers who were in here earlier saying the same thing."

So the Marine headed into the bayou that same day and a few hours later came upon two men standing waist deep in the water. He thought, "those must be the two Rangers the guy in town was talking about." Just then, the Marine saw a tremendously long gator swimming rapidly underwater towards one of the Rangers.

Just as the gator was about to attack, the Ranger grabbed its neck with both hands and strangled it to death with very little effort. Then both Rangers dragged it on shore and flipped it on its back. Laying nearby were several more of the creatures.

One of the Rangers then exclaimed, "Damn, this one doesn't have any shoes either!"

Edited by Creepy847

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At the end of the night a Marine leaves a bar.

 

Outside he sees a nun. He walks over to her and slaps her in the face. Then he punches her in the stomach and knocks her over.

 

He proceeds to kick her several times and when he's done he bends down to her and says, "Not as tough as a Marine, are you Batman?"

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Okay, my turn.

Creepy, you asked for this....

 

Military Birth Control

 

After having their 11th child, a U.S. Marine and his wife decided that was enough, as they could not afford a larger house on their housing allowance. So the Marine went to sick call and told the doctor that he and his wife didn't want anymore children.

 

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but due to cost-cutting, the base hospital no longer performed that procedure. The Marine could have it done off base, at his own expense, said the doctor, but it could be very expensive. A less costly alternative, said the doctor, was to go home, get a get a cherry bomb, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

 

The Marine said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man in the world, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

 

"Trust me," said the doctor.

 

So, the man went home, lit the cherry bomb, and put it in a beer can.

 

He held the can up to his ear and began to count, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5," at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs, and resumed counting on his other hand.

 

This procedure also works with most soldiers, some sailors, and a few airmen

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