hrc 156 Posted December 10, 2012 Who remembers the best and most inappropriate puppet show ever! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 10, 2012 Haha, I loved it ! One of the episodes where one of them attempt to beat the longest handjob world record was awesome ! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RogerSmith 72 Posted December 11, 2012 (Playstation 2 Emulator) Hopefully this will replace playing on the actual machine soon. Got to play some Ace Combat too, wish it wasn't buggy on PCSX2. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hrc 156 Posted December 11, 2012 (edited) Most parents need to take a hint from Santa on how to deal with the greedy little brats they’ve raised!! Love it! Dear Santa, How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for Christmas. I hope you remember that when Christmas Day comes. Merry Christmas,Timmy Jones * * Dear Timmy, Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn't want you to get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I'll bring you something you can go outside and play with. Merry Christmas, Santa Claus *** Mr. Claus, Seeing that I have fulfilled the "naughty vs. Nice" contract, set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn't want to turn this joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don't you think that a jab at my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit trite? Respectfully,Tim Jones * * Mr. Jones, While I have acknowledged you have met the "nice" criteria, need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action, well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney's have been on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days. Very Truly Yours,S. Claus * * Now look here Fat Man, I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it! I was attempting to be polite about this but you dissed my looks and my friends. Now you just be disrespecting me. I'm about to tweet my boys and we’re gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I'm taking my game console, my game, my phone, and whatever I want. WHAT EVER I WANT’s BRA!! T-Bone * * Listen Pizza Face, Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? "He sees you when you're sleeping; He knows when you're awake". Sound familiar, genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your s**t wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people that if I described them right now, you'd throw up your Totino's pizza roll all over the carpet of your mom's basement. You're not getting what you asked for, but I'm still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in you're ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia. S Clizzy * * Dear Santa, Bring me whatever you see fit. I'll appreciate anything. Timmy * * Timmy, That's what I thought you little bastard. Santa Edited December 11, 2012 by hrc 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hrc 156 Posted December 11, 2012 (edited) B52STRATO: Damn son! Edited December 11, 2012 by hrc Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 11, 2012 I especially imagine the father's, Chief Sergeant like, very proud voice. Your last one, mainly the "gansta rap" section "WHAT EVER I WANT’s BRA!! T-Bone" is nice ! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hrc 156 Posted December 11, 2012 The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publikenthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vordskontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nesher 628 Posted December 11, 2012 (edited) B52, we have a similar joke to that pic haha (hope I'll translate it properly) this young paratrooper comes to his father to tell him about his first jump father: "how was it?" paratrooper: "when we got to the LZ the instructor told to me to jump" father: "did you?" paratrooper: "I told him I was scared to jump, then he told me: "if you don't jump I'll f**k you up your ass"" father: "and did you jump?" paratrooper: "just a little bit at first" lol Edited December 11, 2012 by Nesher 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 11, 2012 Haha, it fits well too with this story Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 12, 2012 Cellphone generations 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
+Fates 63 Posted December 13, 2012 I've actually owned one from each of those groups. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 14, 2012 The young men & pregnancy test 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RogerSmith 72 Posted December 15, 2012 (pic) They looked westernized or had good tourism back then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 15, 2012 It was also kindly like this in Iraq before 1967, many Westerners living there, and their women should not necessarily be covered in public. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zzzspace 2 Posted December 15, 2012 Photoshop Hillary ... before her butt attacked. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zzzspace 2 Posted December 15, 2012 (edited) Speaking of which; http://www.fart-soun...sound_board.htm helluva mod Edited December 15, 2012 by zzzspace 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hrc 156 Posted December 15, 2012 A young couple is out carousing one evening. While driving down the highway the guy says to the girl, "If I go 100 miles an hour, will you take off your clothes?" She agrees and he begins to speed up. When the speedometer hits 100 she starts to strip. When she gets all her clothes off he is so busy staring at her that he drives off the road and flips the car. The girl is thrown clear without a scratch but her clothes and her boyfriend are trapped in the car. "Go get help," he pleads. She replies, "I can't, I'm naked." He points to his shoe that was thrown clear and says "Cover yourself with that and go get help." She takes the shoe, covers herself, and runs to the gas station down the road. When she arrives she is frantic and yells to the attendant, "Help! Help! My boyfriend's stuck!" The attendant looks down at the shoe covering her crotch and replies, "I'm sorry Miss. He's too far in." 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
B52STRATO 215 Posted December 15, 2012 This one is a Frenchie classic: Three youngs boys speak at school during de recess time The first says: "My dad is a conductor on an high-speed train, he goes 320 km/h !" The second responds "Mine is a Captain onboard the Concorde ! He crosses the Atlantic in less than four hours !" The others are impressed, then the two turn to the last and asked: "And you, what your father does ?" "The mine is awesome ! He works at the local civil service building, he ends his work at 17H and at 15H he is already at home !!" 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zzzspace 2 Posted December 15, 2012 Only thing better than a great song is a hot woman singing it. Deborah Conway - It s Only The Beginning https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=sxR70fpZ870 Natalie Imbruglia - Torn (Live) https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=tqWjI0YiPUQ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
