Parachute retarded bombs

[+Trotski 936]

Does anyone know where I can find any of these, either in the 500Lb/KG or up to 1000Lb/Kg range, I used to have one but I cannot find it anywhere. 

[+daddyairplanes 10,311]

are you talking about the ballutes,

or actual parachutes? the Mk8xAIR weapons are like above, everyone else used fins like Snakeye iirc

the ones like pictured are all over the download section, both in weapons packs and in various aircraft mods (cough cough DA B-52 mods nudge nudge)

[+Trotski 936]

No not balutes, actual old school Chutes, my good friend Nightshade sent me some, just a few minutes ago, I am sure I had some 750 lb Parachute retarded ones, but I cant for the life of me find the buggers. Also the Weapons packs are so vast , that trawling through them to find one single weapon is .........Well you get the picture.

[Wrench 9,883]

Please, gentlemen!!

In these days of political correctness, they are NOT retarded bombs. The new term for them is "vertically and horizontally velocity challenged bombs" If fact, "bomb" may also not be correct, it should/could be replaced by "multi-weight explosive package".

thank you for you time and consideration

[+Nightshade/PR 8,006]

While i agree with your nod towards inclusion of all our explosive brothers, drop a string of these 1000 lb special children from an F-4 at less than 50 feet (before the chute has time to fully deploy) over an enemy runway, and the resulting negative reaction of your aircraft to pieces separating hurriedly from the frame will make you utter that very phrase, and THEN you will understand why they are called "retarded" bombs.

And it ain't got nothing to do with the bombs.

Trust me on this one.

[+Trotski 936]

Device, Alternatively stable, Horizontally and vertically enabled (  Special ) loud noise and inconveniencing, for the use of. Mark Alternative, and non offending number. With soft and fluffy wrapping, to prevent any untoward damage to the naughty enemy....Ooops sorry, personas of opposing ideas and quite correct acceptable alternative views....Phew !! ahhh fuck it...Bomb, big, huge bang and blood guts and damnation, mark who gives a shit. A1 ( of course, because we got to have an A1 ) 

[+Trotski 936]

Or, for us Brits, because we are so polite.......Bang tube , awfully loud and inconsiderate, vertically dropped, with regards from your friendly British neighbourhood awfully jolly good chaps, delivered with love, and fluffy pink bunny wunnies. Top hole eh wot wot !! 

[+daddyairplanes 10,311]

4 hours ago, trotski00 said:

Also the Weapons packs are so vast , that trawling through them to find one single weapon is .........Well you get the picture.

tell me you dont mod without saying you dont mod

quite familiar with how big they are. although i did break my copy of Gunnys pack down by rough era/area (vietnam, europe, 50s 80s etc)

and i are an old school retired NCO. i know these weapons are too dumb to understand they are being insulted by being called retarded. laser guided weapons, on the other hand, are highly sensitive and you must watch yourself around them

[Eagle114th 695]

3 hours ago, Wrench said:

Please, gentlemen!!

In these days of political correctness, they are NOT retarded bombs. The new term for them is "vertically and horizontally velocity challenged bombs" If fact, "bomb" may also not be correct, it should/could be replaced by "multi-weight explosive package".

thank you for you time and consideration

"Vertically and Horizontally Velocity Challenged Multi-Weight Explosive Package"

Short for VHVCMWEP

Now we could create VHVCMWEP mod pack.

[+Trotski 936]

Oh yes I did plow my way through the various packs, of course I did, however, due to extreme shell shock, and eye boggling, I failed to find the droid I was looking for, However the Mk 82 para retarded are just the job, thank you all for your help, so problem solved. I did also find them in the B52 files you mentioned, So thank you for that pointer !! 

I think the issue is I have not really delved into the area of munitions, retarded, or well adjusted, and sometimes the packs can be rather intimidating, and give , in a lot of cases at least, very little clue as to what the weapon actually is, without looking at the Data,INI file for the thing, it also doesnt help that many of the weapons in question, are called different things, rather than having the "idiot guide" clue in the title ( IE mk 82 Parachute retarded Bomb) 

[+Gepard 11,360]

OMG what kind of stuff you have smoked. I want it too!

[+Trotski 936]

Napalm fumes, they smell really good in the morning you know