HouseHobbit 2 Posted July 30, 2012 (edited) Orcs of the skies unite - we need to get this hobbit Mmuahahahahahaaaaa I eat Orcs for fun! On goes the Ring! Great now I can't see my feets! Here is Baron Von Hobbits record! for all to see.. Baron Von Hobbit, born 1363 (Shire Years)in Middle Earth, he entered Elf Air Corps flight training on 10 March 1383 (Shire Years), and received his wings on 31 October. In September 1384 (Shire years) he was assigned to Elfish Fighter Squadron, The Fighter Group in The Shire, where he flew ,many combat missions. In His second training flight Hobbit held off six flying Orcs to good effect! Then Hobbit's fourth flight he engaged a large Ugly Cave Troll, forcing the Cave Troll to Runaway! **The Elf's were amazed.. In July 1384 (Shire Years) Master Ace Hobbit was selected to join the cadre of the newly established Gandulf Fighter Group then forming at Treebeard Field, Rivendell. This group was Master Gandulf's unit, the first Lightning group in the Elf Air Force. Hobbit was initially assigned to the Gandulf 1 Fighter Squadron. The Group moved to Rivendell, Middle Earth in August, and began to support Gandulf's drive up the northern coast of New Rivendell. Hobbit shot down two Dragons on a pixie escort mission to Wewak on 21 August, a Flying Orc near Roundtop on 22 September. The evil one struck back, attacking the Middle Earth air bases on October 15. Hobbit downed two of the raiding Dragons over Gondor Bay that day to gain Ace status. Three days later he was promoted to Captain Hobbit- Master Ace. He downed 11 more Orc's in December, eight on the 13th and 15th and the others on the 21st. Taking command of the Gandulf (1) Elfish Squadron on 22 January, Hobbit destroyed another 7 Flying Orc's the next day. Over the next few weeks the Gandulf 1 Squadron flew numerous strike missions against targets in Mordor and the Boundary regions. On 3 April Hobbit shot down an "Ring Rider" and a Dragon on a low level Pixie escort mission against enemy camps in Mordor. He returned to The Shire as a Hero.. Then a rest before returning to do battle with the Dark Lord. And there was MUCH Rejoicing!! Hobbit returned to the War in January 1385(Shire Years) to become group operations officer. Flying from the Rivendell Areodrome on 28 March 1385(Shire Years), he destroyed a "Ring Rider" near Tree Island, Rivendell. At this stage, the Lightnings of the Gandulf Fighter Group, based at Shire Field near Rivendell, flew mostly ground support, mop-up missions and a few long range pixie escort missions. As the latter offered the only real opportuities to engage the Dark Lord's fighters, the pilots eagerly sought these missions. In his role as group operations officer, Master Ace Hobbit was able to assign himself to one of these missions on March 28 - a Elf strike on River Raider naval convoy near Gondor River region. All three squadrons of the Gandulf 1 Elf Squadron were committed that day, two flights - eight warriors, from each. Master Ace Hobbit now led the Gandulf 1 Elfish Squadron's Red Flight. Twenty Lightnings approached the Gondor River region with the Pixies, when they spotted the River Raider convoy and its covering escort, about a dozen Flying Orc's. The Orc's didn't seem to be in any formations larger than pairs, and apparently intent on the Pixies, they didn't react immediately when the Lightnings closed on their rear quarter. Hobbit approached on pair, and opened up at extreme range, missing his target, but forcing it take evasive action. With a slight nudge, he re-directed his dagger and his Fire Lance to the second Orc in the pair. This time his fire struck home, and as he closed the range, he saw hits along the body and right wing. The Orc burst into flames, made sharp right turn, and dived into the sea. This action had carried Hobbit far beyond the River Raider convoy and the Pixie's, so he turned back to cover the Pixie's. Finishing the day with an impressive score against the Dark Lord and his forces..Many enemies of Middle Earth fell to the ability of Master Ace Baron Von Hobbit, and the First Orc war with the Help and fighting Spitit of Master Hobbit this was a Great victory!! Hail to the Victory of all free folk of Middle Earth.. Thus began the tales of Master Ace Baron Von Hobbit and The battles for Middle Earth TALLY RECORD: 101 Confirmed DECORATIONS: Gandulf Sword with Diamonds, Elf Silver Star, The Shire Legion of Merit, Gondor Flying Cross with 3 OLCs and the Elf Air Medal with 9 OLCs. Edited July 30, 2012 by HouseHobbit Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Von Paulus 8 Posted July 30, 2012 That's an impressive curriculum, HouseHobbit. No Nazgûls? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hasse Wind 46 Posted July 30, 2012 Pink Polka dots are for the crazy pilots - but ponies are for Sissies! Tell that to the Pony Express riders. Or maybe you meant Sissi, the Empress of Austria? Or the elite Finnish light infantry, known as sissi? Hobbit would be a great addition to the questionable list of BOC members. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Olham 164 Posted July 30, 2012 Lou - aerh - Mr. President! A Hobbit.. - aerhm - arh - pilot! Yes - a pilot who is barmy enough to fly around in that kite over the front lines - I mean, not only the enemy will shoot after him! - aerh - where was I? Ah, yes - who is barmy enough... - a, gawd, this takes too long - just give that man the badge, so that he will have allowance to buy the drinks at our fine Club Bar, I say! Dej? Come on, we need your acceptance, Sir! I'm thirsty! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted July 30, 2012 I eat Orcs for fun! On goes the Ring! See you in the skies over middle earth hobbit! Question? Whats an orcs favourite food - flamed grilled hobbit - MMUAHAHAHAHAHAH! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HouseHobbit 2 Posted July 30, 2012 (edited) What foul times are these when Orcs may travel unchallenged in the skies over our Brave but somewhat disoriented aerodromes!! To Arms I say, (and if "she" is really good looking to, legs also!!) OFF to wreck OFF Anyone seen my DR1 i seemed to have miss placed it again, too much Mead!! Those chaps in the Barmy club can down some Mead and castor Oil !! And now we sing!! :sohappy: And dance and fall down Edited July 30, 2012 by HouseHobbit Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Olham 164 Posted July 30, 2012 (edited) Okay, okay - when you guys run can run amok by prose here, then I can do it too! "Where is my double Scotch? Waiter - a Scotch is a bottle of whisky, right? A double Scotch are two bottles of whisky then - right? I'm not so drunk yet, that I see two bottle of whisky, when you bring me a half empty glass! Now - where is my other hand?! (Hups!) What?! I'm sittin on it??! Ah - haha - yes, I'm trying to breed me another left hand! You must know I'm left-handed, and I could well use a third hand for the lady who goes with me, understand? Wink, wink! Nudge, nudge! Now let's all sing together: Come lollard, raise your lute and sing, and to my ears her beauty bring Like Maddox in the days of old we'll feast and drink until we fold And folding still we'll spare a thought for what's been lost and what's been caught And maybe then begin again for love is life, not poison (Excerpt from "All This And More" by Keith Reid / Procol Harum) Edited July 30, 2012 by Olham Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
angles1100 0 Posted July 31, 2012 Ahhh all becomes clear now so RAC actually stands for Rivendell Aero Club , silly me cheers Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted July 31, 2012 (edited) Ltn Spleen-Ripper of the fame Mordor Severed Head Sqn takes to the skies. Now where's that hobbit! Skin is still a WIP. Edited July 31, 2012 by Beanie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flyby PC 23 Posted July 31, 2012 Guys this is OFF, and with the level of detail, we all know 2nd Lieutenant Tolkein is down there, somewhere, and he's watching the skies and taking notes. Tell him how the book ends before he's written it and a blue Police box turn up, and next we'll be sucked down some worm hole ripped in the space time continuum which is bigger on the inside than it is the outside. Mind you, if Tolkein is down there, so is Hitler. What a spooky thought! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HouseHobbit 2 Posted July 31, 2012 Ltn Spleen-Ripper of the fame Mordor Severed Head Sqn takes to the skies. Now where's that hobbit! Skin is still a WIP. Tis a evil beast indeed, but hobbits have No fear (or common sense). The gauntlet has been tossed!! To Arms!! Or in Hobbits case two feets!! Where i put my sonic screwdriver, so I can disassemble this Nasty tripe.. Have at you!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted July 31, 2012 Guys this is OFF, So may the force be with you; or live long and proser is out of the question? Although my personal favourite Na-Nu Na-Nu Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted August 1, 2012 (edited) The Hobbit Story Ends My thanks to RAF - he must also be a supporter of the green skins! Edited August 1, 2012 by Beanie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Olham 164 Posted August 1, 2012 You know, Beanie, that the Hobbits beat the Orks in the end? ... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Von Paulus 8 Posted August 1, 2012 (edited) Hobbits are tough, Beanie. I bet the little guy just jumped into another polka after the crash. Edited August 1, 2012 by Von Paulus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted August 1, 2012 You know, Beanie, that the Hobbits beat the Orks in the end? ... Depends on who writes the story - hobbits always lose in mine. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HouseHobbit 2 Posted August 1, 2012 Depends on who writes the story - hobbits always lose in mine. Tis foul times indeed when any ugly Orc may threaten and challenge a brave but somewhat Crazy hobbit! The air forces of the Elfish flying corps have been alerted! Pixies and Elfish types shall scour the sky ( and the dirty dishes) for the foul and smelly Orc that have caused the near fatal attack upon a Brave hobbit! (I'm getting better) Okay the near fatal but less then deadly attack upon a somewhat brave hobbit.. ( nope nearly completely healed now) The painful and messy attack upon a brave hobbit.. (Nearly soiled my armor, but recovered I think) Oh Bugger! the some what scary and shocking attack upon a not so brave but stupid hobbit!! ( all is fine now feeling much better) Will some one just shoot the **#$#@ hobbit!! Off to Hide ! On Goes the Ring!! You all are all OFF here!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slartibartfast 153 Posted August 1, 2012 (edited) May the Farce be with you and May Mighty Yoghurt preserve us... OFF this sounds like you guys have been on my special brewed Schnapps again... illicit homemade Schnapps with a cordite and castor oil chaser... Dr Who with Lt Tolkien and the little Corporal chap mixed in with Mork... who isn't an Orc and never forget So Long and thanks for all the fish... To the Hobbit next time just remember you need to be playing at least a Polka to go with the plane... as Strauss, Beethoven et al will be composers of the decomposing variety... Now all after me what is the air speed velocity of a laden Swallow ??? :drinks: Edited August 1, 2012 by Slartibartfast Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stumpjumper 3 Posted August 2, 2012 if were taqlkign ponies then i say go wth one of these Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flyby PC 23 Posted August 2, 2012 See it all makes sense now. "Sir, sir, sir, can I paint my Se5 any colour I like?" "Any colour you like laddie, so long as it's RFC green". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Olham 164 Posted August 2, 2012 (edited) Now, that is a better choice - he could at least use the dark "Apocalypse Pony". Edited August 2, 2012 by Olham Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Beanie 4 Posted August 2, 2012 (edited) The air forces of the Elfish flying corps have been alerted! Pixies and Elfish types shall scour the sky So hobbits need the likes of the disgusting, puny, pathetic elves and pixies do do their fighting for them - unless there is a meal involved. The glorious and magnificent pilots of the orc severed head sqn stand ready! (when we're not lying down in a drunken stupor). As for little ponies - there great between two slicies of bread! (The hobbit has unleashed my inner Orc!) Edited August 2, 2012 by Beanie Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HouseHobbit 2 Posted August 2, 2012 Beware!! Tony Fokker has just given the hobbit another purple and pink polka dotted beauty, and Snoopy has joined forces to see that the Orcs are forever driven from the human world!! It is time for all brave hobbits, Pixies and Elfs to rally to the aid of man.. and there will be many Orc skins on the walls this day!! Also, to enjoy at least 6 meals of victory this day.. and More Ale and Mead for all.. On Goes the Ring!! Great now I can't see my feets again!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slartibartfast 153 Posted August 2, 2012 Polka's Ponies whatever next... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
