Real Life (tm) troubles

[+Muesli 2,158]

Hi friends,

 

I am making it short.

After 14 years together, my wife and I have decided to file for divorce. Although

we still love each other very much, my PTSD gets in the way too often,

hindering our every day lives.

 

 

Don't know for how long, but there will be radio silence for the coming time.

 

 

Cheers,

 

Iwan

[mikeymead 17]

Hi,

 

Sorry to hear that, been through a divorce myself a few years back but for very different reasons.

 

I hope you and your soon to be ex wife can remain friends, my divorce was quite amicable in the end but I've had no contact since and have now remarried.

 

Good luck in the future.

 

Mike.

[Slartibartfast 153]

Sorry to hear that, sometimes these things happen and from the PTSD side of it I can understand perfectly lost me a couple of good relationships on the way... also I know how tough it is to deal with trying to explain to someone who doesn't understand or know what it is. Take care of yourself and I wish you the best of luck for the future. As above I hope for the future you and your ex wife to be can be friends.

 

Michael

[+whiteknight06604 934]

Damn,having been through it once(divorce) I'll say that I wish you the best and hope that you and her can keep your heads as things progress. it's never easy and I hope thet your able to resolve your problems and be able to get the most out of life.

[Canadair 16]

Don't even think of stopping modding :) I shot you a pm, give it a read. And if you want feel free to psot it back on this thread, might help someone else :)

[+Piecemeal 450]

My heart goes out to you my friend.

 

Although I admit PTSD is something I've never had, I've only recently attempted suicide and I'm still being treated for chronic depression; so in a way I can understand how life can affect somebody emotionally. To be honest I hadn't planned on informing anyone here about that, but after reading your message and those from others in the past I can see that CA and Third Wire can be an excellent way of blinkering out and forgetting about problems and anxieties for a while. Personally, there's nothing I find more relaxing than putting my favourite music on the iTunes player and flying a few single missions in the SF2 series.

I went through a lengthy divorce about four years ago, so I understand how messy, drawn out and emotionally upsetting these things can be. All I can suggest to you on that count is to think long and hard as to whether this is really what's best for both of you. Living on your own after a break up can be a VERY lonely thing. Believe me I know that first hand. I was lucky in that I met my current Fiance six months later, totally by accident.

 

I mean this sincerely by saying that if you ever want to chat, don't hesitate to send me a PM. Anytime bud. I'm online here more than a few times a day.

[macelena 1,070]

Sorry to hear Iwan, i hope it all ends with as little mess as possible, both for you, her and Sen, stay up my friend-

[+Muesli 2,158]

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE !!!

 

Hi my friends!

 

I thought it would be nice and decent to keep you guys informed.

At this moment I am packing my backpack. Tuesday April 17 I will be going 'back' to Bosnia with

an Army mate of mine. We will be driving in an old diesel VW Golf III and we will be visiting

some sites and cities/villages we remember from our Tour of Duty in 1994 (me) and 1995 (him).

 

This will be a well deserved break from the break-up and divorce I am in. Although everything

is going smooth, the whole procedure is hell. I literally feel heart ache when I see my

soon-to-be-ex-wife. I still love her to death, she still loves me. We both love our son.

It is in his best interest to make the divorce as smooth and easy as possible, only bad

consequence is that it hurts.

 

All of that crap has almost depleted my energy, physically and mentally. First I will go on

road trip, when I get back a whole new trajectory will start with me going to the Military

Hospital for therapy and sessions which are aimed at battling my anger, frustration,

aggressive attitude and the feeling of being an unwelcome foreigner in my own country.

Working on these issues will make me be a better dad for my son in the future, so

I will take the blows like I learned in the military, long time ago.

 

For now, road trip! 2,000 kilometres driving in a car with 580,000 km (340,000m) on

the clock and the prospects of having to digest gallons and gallons of Slivovic....

It's a tradition, and who am I to wave off that hospitality??!!

 

Destinations will be as follows, we will be leaving from The Netherlands and we will

cross Germany, Austria and Slovenia.

From Ljubljana to Zagreb, we will head to Tuzla with destination Srebrenica.

We'll stay there for two days, sleeping at friends.

After that we'll visit Sarajevo for two days, sleeping at a friend's place, go to Busovaca

in central Bosnia and from there on we will drive to Mostar. Stay in a hostel and

relax a bit.

From Mostar we'll go to the coastline via Metkovic and follow the Makarska Riviera route

to Split. Sea, beach and hopefully nice weather. I'll bring my swimming trunks!

From Split, we'll buy supplies and return on our home voyage.

 

I think I'll be back April 29, if we are not mugged, shot or arrested. After that, Real Life

starts all over again. If interested I will post some pictures here, definetely on

my Facebook account where some of you guys and I already hooked up.

 

See you later guys,

 

zbogom, moji prijatelji!

[Slartibartfast 153]

Hey friend hope it all goes well for you... about the divorce but I understand what you are saying. Also later this year I am going to be making my trip down there by bike though with slightly less Km's than your Golf... Let me know your route through Austria as if you are making an overnight stop here I may be able to make a trip to meet you... Good luck on your trip and I hope it heals a few wounds or at least allows some closure. As to when you go back good luck with that as well I hope it works out for you and that it helps you... Enjoy the trip and leave some slivovic for me when I get there...

 

Take care

[+Piecemeal 450]

Good to hear things are going smoothly for you, bud!

 

Be sure to check in on us from time to time - and don't forget the pics!!!

 

[garyscott 11]

I was there late '94 - mid '95. British Army.

 

All i can say my friend is that there is light at the end of the tunnel. . . . . .

 

Enjoy your road trip, hopefully put some fresh and new, better images in your head of the places some of us have been, instead of those images we try to suppress.

Im sure you know what i mean . . . . . .

 

zbogom, moji prijatelji. (safe journey my brother.)

[+whiteknight06604 934]

enjoy your "vacation" please post pics here and at facebook. I hope that a little break will recharge you to get through the hard times ahaead.While painful you seem to have a good plan of action for dealing with this tough future. Best wishes and I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. With a little luck and some hard work you can get through this and make yourself a much better life.While I am from a different country than you I respect your millitary service you did for your nation and pray that your fellow countrymen give you the respect you deserve.

[Derk 265]

GO IWAN !!!! Have the best time ever over there.... As for the Golf: it is a less than 4 promille increase in kilometers for the car, so it will manage...... And: you will NOT be coming back as a stranger to your own & my country, be sure of that !!!!

Edited April 15, 2012 by Derk

[Nesher 628]

Iwan my friend, hope everything will turn out okay and the way that will help you deal with the whole thing

I had a bad few days and I guess my problems seem so tiny compared to what happens to the people surrounding us

take care and enjoy the trip!

 

Cheers

[+Brain32 265]

zbogom, moji prijatelji. (safe journey my brother.)

 

Actually this means "Goodbye my friends"...if the bracketed is intended as a translation, if not then my bad...

 

@Muesli

Weather is getting better here for the past few days so by the time you reach Makarska it should be really nice

[+Muesli 2,158]

I am home!

 

For anyone who's interested and who has Facebook, check here

to view my photos!

 

https://www.facebook...iwan.ruedisueli

[macelena 1,070]

Mostar!!!

[Derk 265]

Bridge at Mostar isn't it? Looks like they did a good job on it ... Enjoy yourself Iwan !!!!