I'm not going to sit here and brainlessly point out Mr. Column5's flaws -- we all know he has them -- but I am going to say a little about how the net effect of Column5's musings will be a generation of kids who are unable to read, write, or distinguish good from evil. So let's begin, quite properly, with a brief look at the historical development of the problem, of its attempted solutions, and of the eternal argument about it. Column5 once tried to convince a bunch of us that it is annoying to question his memoranda. Fortunately, calmer heads prevailed and a number of people informed the rest of the gang that Column5 claims that bad things "just happen" (i.e., they're not caused by Column5 himself). Well, I beg to differ.
We were put on this planet to be active, to struggle, and to enable adversaries to meet each other and establish direct personal bonds that contradict the stereotypes they rely upon to power their wily doctrines. We were not put here to compromise the free and open nature of public discourse, as Column5 might insist. One might conclude that it would help if he realized that education and wisdom aren't necessarily the same thing. Alternatively, one might conclude that mudslinging is his forte. In either case, I realize that some people may have trouble reading this letter. Granted, not everyone knows what "succinylsulphathiazole" means, but it's nevertheless easy to understand that Column5 maintains that there should be publicly financed centers of deconstructionism. That's not just a lie but is actually the exact opposite of the truth -- and Column5 knows it. Why is Column5 deliberately turning the truth on its head like that? The answer is a bit of a taboo subject but that won't stop me from telling you. You see, Column5 says that he wants to make life better for everyone. Lacking a coherent ideology, however, Column5 always ends up turning porn stars loose against us good citizens. I think I've dished it out to Mr. Column5 as best as I can in this letter. I hope you now understand why I say that he is controlling and demanding.