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Muesli

"You're not cool!" blog

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Hi FastCargo, you really cracked me up!

 

A pity there are those people, who ruin it for the majority.

It is as recognisable as the dude who thought a particular handgun was cooler than the one I had when I served. He made

his assumption based on the sidearm he uses in a computergame...... super FAIL!

 

 

 

Muesli

 

 

PS: I for one would really like it if you told a few of your Rhino stories!

 

"I'll show mine if you show yours"" ...

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one its bout like the guys that talks to soldiers comin home from a deployment how he served only to find out he did 3 weeks of basic and got booted out.

 

two i second muesli's motion phantom phables in the next FC blog please!

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Um you guys misread. FC doesn't have F-4 Phantom time.

 

I wouldn't in a million years think that I know a thing or two about what flying the Viper is REALLY like just because I've flown it in F4 and I have 3500+ hours of fast jet time.

 

This is a comparison to F4 (Falcon 4.0) not the F-4 jet. He is saying that:

 

I wouldn't in a million years think that I know a thing or two about what flying the Viper is REALLY like just because I've flown it in Falcon 4.0 and I have 3500+ hours of fast jet time.

 

 

That is what he is saying.

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I wish I did have Phantom time...

 

Anyway, thanks for the comments guys. I figured everyone in our hobby has encountered this kind of individual at one time or another...

 

FC

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Nice Post, i really enjoyed good.gif

 

specially because i've think many times in speak witha pilot using FSX or even Falcon 4.0 but than i figured that was totally ridiculous, now i confirm that, specially when 12 year old kids speaking with airclub guys using FS as a comparisson, in fact is much similar but up there its totally differentdrinks.gif

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Thanks for the tips, found another very interesting side of this forum this way. It amazes me how good some of you are at writing a sensible story or making clear an opinion in a well balanced way. In short : cool !!grin.gif

 

Derk

Edited by Derk

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I wish I did have Phantom time...

 

Anyway, thanks for the comments guys. I figured everyone in our hobby has encountered this kind of individual at one time or another...

 

FC

 

As a civilian who studies military avaition alot, I get those kinds of people too, they based their "knowledge" on games ugh. FC, next time you're in dayton, yeller and I will give you my famous USAFM tours :) deal?

 

Falcon

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I've seen this bahavior in scale modelers also. Because they've studied a certain aircraft for a project, I've seen and heard them ask some off the wall questions to crews/pilots at airshows. While they've tried to politely answer it in the best way they could, the "Are you F-ing kidding me?" look was also given.

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"I've seen and heard them ask some off the wall questions to crews/pilots at airshows."

 

some of those have been quite entertaining. A couple of us saw one guy explaining to his girlfriend as they stood next to the E-2 on static display, that this was a sub hunter and that was the sonar dome on top.

 

had a hard time keeping a straight face.....................

 

the worst response to one of those was, well, lets just say the aftermath was entertaining for the rest of us.......

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"I've seen and heard them ask some off the wall questions to crews/pilots at airshows."

 

some of those have been quite entertaining. A couple of us saw one guy explaining to his girlfriend as they stood next to the E-2 on static display, that this was a sub hunter and that was the sonar dome on top.

 

had a hard time keeping a straight face.....................

 

the worst response to one of those was, well, lets just say the aftermath was entertaining for the rest of us.......

 

 

You are strong, i wouldn't keep my face for more than 5 seconds rofl.gif

 

 

 

 

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Heh, airshows are pretty funny, I did a lot of them back in the day.

 

By far the most often asked question of me at an airshow:

 

"Is this an F-5?"

 

I get that one a LOT! If it wasn't for the fact that it wouldn't make good public relations, you could turn it into a drinking game. Or a betting match...

 

Now, I'll be fair, the F-5B and T-38A/B/C are very similar looking. Main fuselage, tail, general wing and slab structure are all almost identical. Even guys with lots of experience viewing aircraft can mistake one for the other at first glance.

 

 

Far and away though, my favorite airshow story involving misidentification (that's fit for public consumption) concerns a group of individuals at the August 2000 Abottsford Airshow, British Columbia, Canada. The airshow was Friday, Saturday, Sunday.

 

On Friday, these yahoos had thrown sheep's blood on a F-15E from Seymour Johnson. No damage was done, but everyone heard about it of course.

 

On Saturday, these guys were back, but they had a police escort. Obviously, they were free to express their views, but no damage/defacement to aircraft or personnel...the police were here to see to that.

 

Anyway, they're roaming around, and decide they are going to do a little sing-in in front of a particularly nasty looking aircraft...quite obviously a killer of civilians, flown by war criminals. All black, with bright blood red lettering...those fiends!

 

Yep, my T-38A...black and red, flown in from Beale AFB.

 

The lead police officer came by a few minutes beforehand and asked if it was okay. I'm not sure if I had a legal right to refuse them anyway, but even then, I've never had a problem with protests as long as they don't interfere/assualt people, or damage property. Of course, it was all I could do to not laugh when he asked. I actually had to ask him to say it again, because I was unsure that he said what I though he said - "Wait, out of all the aircraft here, they want to protest in front of mine???"

 

I said they could knock themselves out as long as they didn't damage or deface anything. Sure enough, these very serious folks stood in front of my aircraft, singing songs, holding signs, and they filmed themselves (I stood WELL out of the way). I really didn't have the heart to tell them the only thing I've ever destroyed in a T-38 is a student's ego.

 

I took pictures of them instead.

 

However, I kept knowledge about the protest to myself. Last thing I wanted was to not be able to go to the airshow next year because our squadron would be worried about getting protested! Funny, because a few days later, a general message was sent out to all USAF units cautioning about protesters damaging equipment or personnel, specifically detailing the Abbotsford Airshow F-15E incident.

 

I really should find and post those pictures somewhere...

 

FC

Edited by FastCargo

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these yahoos had thrown sheep's blood on a F-15E from Seymour Johnson.

:good:

I read, that in 1987 in Iraq after particularly successful MiG-25RB missions mechanics would kill a lamb and the pilots would dip their hands in its blood and make palm marks on still warm fuselages.

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On the plus side, that F-15E was passed over and the other F-15E's firstborn were slain in their sleep...

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I've heard that too...in any hobby, there are folks who take it a little far...

 

FC

 

I hate it when people pick you up for the tiniest little thing, or act like a 20 year vet when you're prolly with a 20 year armchair expert. (I'm sure I know jack sh*t about most things anyways. :tongue: )

 

Like so:

"Hey, check out at that Hornet."

"You mean that Super Hornet?"

 

Or when they ask a question in a such a way as to call you an idiot without actually saying so. I remeber hearing Clancy do something like that during the Sum of All Fears commentary late in the movie when some F-16s dropping some guided bombs and he said something like "I didn't know they could do that." K, we know you know damn well what those planes can do from the 500 books you've written. Don't be a d*ck about it. Thing is, I'm sure I've done that to people when I was a super plane geek when I was a kid. Christ I hope I haven't done it recently... or ever... :fool::sorry:

 

 

That said, I've always wanted to ask someone about those chemical toilets in those B-1s that's been bugging me for years, but I don't wanna ask you FC for sounding like somekind of wannbe now... :biggrin:

Edited by Say What?!

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Before I got into flight simming I was really into scale models. A friend owned one of the local hobby shops and I would help out sometimes doing things as holding workshops on basic modeling techniques or explain to a parent or new modeler what they would need in addition to their kit, paint/glue/tools, that kind of stuff. One day I brought in an F/A-18 to put in the display case. One of the "experts" got all whinny about how I messed up the paint job, it was the wrong shade of grey and there were patches of other greys that didn't even match around the panel lines and on some panels I must have accidentally dipped the brush into black paint and wiped it off with my thumb(it was with a Q-tip) and on and on. After listening to this he stated that he "knew for a fact" that the Navy would never let a Hornet look like this because that's not how they look at all the airshows he's been to. After I asked if he was done my reply was STFU, he'd never been in the Navy let alone a squadron and the bird I built was as close to one belonging to the unit I had been assigned to. Then I told him grey is grey and as long as the spray can says grey on it a sailor will use it. This little waste had never heard of weathering and admitted that he never built any of the kits he bought, he just put them on the shelf hoping that they would go up in value. After that day he would hardly show up at the store but since he hardly bought anything and usually got everyone else pissed off it was no great loss.

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Oh come on, just ask!

 

FC

 

Alright... if you're in that thing and someone has to take a dump, does it stink out the fight deck or does the breathing apparatus circumvent this? What is the etiquette re newspapers? What if they're really noisy? If someone has to go who's a lower rank than you, do you guys dip your wingtips a few times to make it hard for them to stay seated? I had more questions about this from when I was a kid... but you can see where it's going. :smile:

 

See, I've never see a photo, I only saw it in cutaway drawings. And it's been bugging me.

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Alright... if you're in that thing and someone has to take a dump, does it stink out the fight deck or does the breathing apparatus circumvent this?

 

I wish it did! No such luck I'm afraid....

 

What is the etiquette re newspapers? What if they're really noisy?

 

Well, no one is going to be trying to check you out when you're on the can, so you can pretty much do what you want. Also, you have to remember, like most modern aircraft, even the airliners, the cockpit area is kind of noisy (imagine a large vacuum cleaner), so depending on the aircraft, you may not even be able to talk to each other without intercom. The B-1 was a bit noisy, so you needed the intercom. The airliners I've flown are a bit quieter, so you can talk and be heard, but you have to speak up a bit. Either way, unless you like to shout while you're on the can, no one is going to hear if you're pushing out a torpedo.

 

 

If someone has to go who's a lower rank than you, do you guys dip your wingtips a few times to make it hard for them to stay seated? I had more questions about this from when I was a kid... but you can see where it's going. :smile:

 

Oh HELL no...because then the rest of the crew would have to live with it for the remainder of the flight!

 

See, I've never see a photo, I only saw it in cutaway drawings. And it's been bugging me.

 

Well, also note that there is a curtain that can be drawn...those were installed once we started having women as crewmembers.

 

But like a lot of things, there is a funny story....

 

For those who don't know, the B-1B's toliet is basically not much different then a port-a-potty. It's simply a removeable box, filled with the blue stuff, which has a knife valve that seals it from the 'bowl' area. The idea is that the knife valve seals it when not in use to prevent spillage during zero or negative G manuvers.

 

Now, the tech order specifically states that the knife valve is to be opened (by pulling a T handle located at the front of the toliet) before the lid of the toliet is raised.

 

The reason that particular note is in the tech order now is because of an incident that happened in the early days of the B-1B being on the line. During flight, one of the crew members went to use the toliet, put the lid up, then went to open the knife valve. However, what had happened was that somehow the 'box' containing the blue stuff (and whatever else) had developed a differential of pressure. In other words, the box had more pressure inside than outside. It makes sense of course, for anyone who has flown in an airliner, you'll see balloons, sealed drinks, sealed packs of food, etc, all 'puff up' because the cabin pressure is lower than the pressure inside the container.

 

Well, our stalwart crewmember opens the knife valve, and because he had to kneel to do it, his upper body was only about a foot away from the bowl area of the toliet. Like anything else where a differential exists, it tries to equalize at the closest point. Which in this case, was the bowl area of the toliet. The air comes rushing out of the box, along with whatever else was in the box at the time (I'll leave that to your imagination) and promptly sprays all over the upper part of the crewmember, along with some of the opposite wall.

 

He was heard to yell "Oh, Sh---" before the mess totally covered his head.

 

We never did ask if he was being reactive or just descriptive....

 

FC

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brought tears to my eyes..........

 

:lol:

 

------------------

 

"grey is grey and as long as the spray can says grey on it a sailor will use it. "

 

truer words were never spoken!!

 

:grin:

 

-----------------

 

back to differential air pressure......

 

this one is from my father who was flying B-25's and such across Texas for awhile for navigator training WWII.

 

 

the scene -

 

across country in B-25 configured for navigator training. Lots of training positions through the tube in back and each one occupied by a navigator student.

 

so...........

low level, across the Texas plains, in summer. Hot, bumpy, hot, bumpy, more bumpy

 

students are getting a bit green in back. (did I say it was hot and bumpy?)

 

the compasses at each position are mounted in a binnacle which forms a very convenient bowl.

 

(did I happen to mention that it was hot and bumpy?)

 

student fills the bowl up....

 

with a little fermentation and some more hot and bumpy, some more bowls get filled up.....

 

up in the cockpit, bumping right along, the smell is getting a bit "ripe". So the co-pilot reaches up to crack the overhead ditching hatch and let in some air. My father, the PIC, yells out "NO!!!!!" to late....

 

(recall aerodynamics and areas of low pressure....)

 

all of the loose papers, checklists, route maps and various "bowl contents" proceed expeditiously up through the tube, into the cockpit and out through the overhead hatch, leaving varying amounts of "residue" on exposed surfaces along the way.

 

it was a long, long way back to the airfield.......

 

:bad:

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That reminds me of something charlielima told about an Spad driver who had to get some unnatural, med induced need on a bag,

and tried to loose it on its wingman regardless of the air behaviour around his cockpit. I´ll try to find the topic

 

Waste in space

Edited by macelena

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