Allright, just happened as i´m posting:
I came happy back home this morning, after buying two bars of bread and...well, a box of profilactics. Home, the only other person was my grandmom, wich is living with us as she recovers from a cancer surgery a few weeks ago. So i proceeded to remove my navy style, hard plastic wind cutting coat, but the zipper was jammed at the neck. So i pulled it all out, and the coat, but couldn´t pull the head out, it was closed to narrow. It was wrapped around my neck, looked just like a Mae West life-saving vest.
So, i went downstairs, where my granny, wich was a taylor, could have told me anything about the zipper or something, just to find her talking to the phone and watching the cooking channel. A couple of cigarettes later, having learned about ways of cooking onion and that my grandma was about to stay a long time talking and watching TV, i walked to the kitchen, got the scissors she just used to cut open a chicken, and tried to cut out the zipper.
The scissors broke, and it was a close call to my arteries...too close for comfort. So i covered my neck with hard clothes in the narrow gap the coat left and went to the garage, wearing my Mae West coat, to get a couple of two-hand grass shears, and cutted the zipper to pieces.
When i got back to the living room, my grandma was still talking on the phone and watching TV, so i phoned my girlfriend to tell her about having the "ammo" and the whole coat incident,just to get her ROFLing at me. Half an hour after i made it home, my granny shouted me from downstairs, and i got smoked for breaking the scissors and tearing the coat in half.